ripped my nicest pair of jeans. Lost most of my appetite. Sad.

Lord, make me a better person.

I want to have the heart of David, one after your own heart. A heart for all people.

Today

I used up so much time catching up on One Piece, while slowly multi-tasking and planning out next semester and kinda the rest of my whole core-curriculum classes. I find planning so enjoyable. It is kinda like finding the fastest point from A to B and then having satisfaction that I’m not going to be using up more time than necessary.

I really felt like just staying alone earlier today and not being social. Well it wasn’t as much as the being social part, just the putting in of effort to have a fun time. A friend who is super busy wanted to do something fun tonight and I felt like I had pressure placed on me to make her night good and not just another study night. So I almost completely blew it off but realized that wouldn’t be good. I ended up having a great night and didn’t have to work hard or anything, things just fell into place. Great night with lots of friends.

But Lord, I feel so lost sometimes. I may have my classes planned out, but where do sports and work and church and clubs and ministry fall into this?! What am I going to put my time into!!? Help me Lord. Help me put more time into you (and sleep).

Is today's image pulsating, or is it just me?

Link: Is today's image pulsating, or is it just me?

The x-ray one

Today is a 25-hour day!!! Sweet!!

but that means there will eventually be a 23 hour day…. sad story!!

How do I deal with this?

I have never loved/enjoyed any team so much. Now, maybe this is dramatic, but would this be similar to people who have their first relationship and then they have trouble letting go, because they don’t know if it will ever happen again? I missed the last meet today because of stuff and it made me pretty sad. This is pretty much the end of the XC season, and I do and don’t want the end. It is a lot more bitter than sweet. What is a few extra hours of sleep everyday in comparison to time with amazing people? Now some of these feelings are probably due to the subconscious thought that these relationships will die w/ XC. It sounds like I need a dozen donuts. haha, jk, but really, I would love to eat some Krispy Kremes right now. (I hope that I really don’t link Krispy Kremes with anti-depression/happiness) Anyways, I need to pray for comfort and direction. All changes are opportunities to grow, opportunities to grow closer to God. Along with this, I need to determine if I want/should do track and then XC. Prayer, prayer.

Why can't everybody just have integrity?